A lot of people are struggling with different types of old habits:
Supporting you with lots of love here, I understand how hard it feels to quit old habits like smoking , eating disorder, drinking problem…..
Most likely, all your friends and family members never really seem to understand what you feel and are very judgemental. They unsuccessfully try to talk you through, changing those habits,
Over past decades I suffered with different bad habits, the longest one lasted for more than 20 years
You’ll be able to break through your old habits, only if your true self is ready.
I remember back when I was 9 years old, I was laying on my bed, face down, my legs and my chest flat on the mattress, and I started to pull my first hair.
I struggled for 20 years with this hair-pulling disorder. Especially when facing stressful periods of my life like exams, arguments, work etc. I tried some methods that my friends/ my family suggested like squeezing a soft ball ,pulling doll hair…however those methods were inefficient,I was praying hoping that this habit will go away.
When I realized I was ready to quit this habit…
I had an opportunity to work on this issue with therapist who kindly offered her help out of friendship since she had helped somebody with this. I remember thinking then “if she helped someone when the same issue, then it can be fixed” and I started browsing solutions on google.
Trichotillomania, a mental disorder that involves recurrent, irresistible urges to pull out hair from your scalp, eyebrows or other areas of your body, despite trying to stop.
I went through different clinic’s website. They suggested a bunch of exercises that weren’t working for me.
Until one day, an article caught my attention. It was written by a blogger struggling with the same habit. She had tried different methods, some of which turned out to be working for her and so I started implementing some of these technics.
Today I am proud to announce that I successfully healed from this mental disorder and I want to share with you the 5 steps system that can help you break free from your bad habits and become the confident person you deserve to be.
Most of these habits started from an emotional pain. In order to fix them, you first have to analyse what triggered it:
1. Identify the triggers (must do)
You must be able to identify this : When ,Where, How , the more clear the better the results.
When do you usually do this?
Where is the place that you do it the most? ( It could be on the bed, Bathroom…)
How do you usually do it? Picture yourself: which hand ? Which fingers are you using? What is your posture. How do you hold that glass of wine? How do you hold that cigarette ? How do you pull off your hair?
2. Look into the mirror with a deep visualisation and remember it (must)
Spend a good amount of time facing the mirror until you have this clarity, visualise your new appearance 1 year from now after quitting the habit as a complete healthy person.
How will you look like after you got rid of this habit? How will your hair look like? How will your skin tone like? How will your teeth look like?
Every time you want to pull hair, recall your healthy beautiful appearance …
This is the most effective step amongst all , every time I have an urge.
3. Break the pattern (pretty effective right after your visualisation )
You need to understand that they are two type of pleasures. Our brain is constructed in such way that its main priority is survival. In order for us to survive, our brain steers us towards two path:
Avoiding shot-term pain -> chasing short-term pleasure:
If you are aiming to solve your problem, you are looking for a long term satisfaction. Unfortunately for you, the brain has this tendency of influencing towards you reptilian thinking The reason that makes it so hard to quit is some kind of pleasure is formed within the habit. However if you realise that habit actually cos you pain or inconvenient instantly. That can rewrite the way you think about that habit.
Lets say you have a hair-pulling disorder, you could put extra lotion on your hand and then try to pull your hair.
I still remembered I had 1-2 year of smoking habit but I was blessed at that time that I developed ear allergy problem related to smoking, every afternoon I wanted to scratch my ears off so badly and later on I search on internet and notice this itchness related to smoking, so very quickly I could quit smoking without much effort because smoking causes real pain instantly.
If you have a drinking habit try adding tones of salt in a super diluted alcohol aiming at making it so disgusting salty to rewire your brain that alcohol tastes disgusting.
4. Draw a monthly Calendar on 1 single piece of paper on the spot that triggers your habit . ( must)
Every time you want to do this again you will see the calendar right next to it reminding yourself. You put a star when the day you did’t do it. By the end of calendar reward yourself with something. Do it at least 2 rounds of the paper ( which costs at most two months.
5. Build a new good habit that gives you a sense of relaxation. ( not a must but its helpful for a new form of pleasure in general )
It could be a form of exercise. Like Running, Cycling, jogging, Boxing… Any type of exercise that you could build up the habits. Through these exercises you achieve a prolonged relaxation in a long term. Like any kind of Good/ or bad habits ,to develop it , you start from small.
Make it easily achievable in the beginning. Take running as an example
I was starting from 5mph ( which is a super slow speed fo Jogging), you will be able to set up a progress through weeks and months.